Because You are the Father

March 26, 2010

By: Ashley B. Vincent & Kristen DeJesus

You have a habit of not wanting to do something with your child. Perhaps you feel scared to give him/her a bath because he/she is little. Maybe you are not changing his/her diaper because you still don’t know the way the diaper faces or which way to wipe. I understand, newborns especially are kind of scary- I was scared to take care of my newborn all by myself for the first couple days, but eventually you get into the swing of things.

And with LOTS of patience and a little practice, everything starts to fall into place. Things become easier and not so scary. Stuff becomes more of a routine and sooner or later you stop thinking about what you are doing (i.e. feeding, changing, bathing… etc) with your child, and just start doing it… maybe…

Unless you are a delusional father who thinks they are doing everything for their child by just paying the bills and that is it. But NEWS FLASH… listen up daddies:

Being a father means being there for your child come hell and high water. Being a father means listening to your child and showing them that you care, letting them see that you are interested in even the most 'mundane' things in their life, their fears, their hopes, and anything and everything in-between.

Being a father means taking the time out of your 'oh-so-busy' day, to sit with your child for 5 minutes while they tell you a story, even if you just think it is a bunch of babble. Being a father includes, but does not stop at, unconditional love, emotional support, financial support, kissing boo-boos, giving hugs, playing 'tea party', reading, and coloring with your child.

Being father means giving up things for your child- when you are in an intense game of Call of Duty or Day of Defeat, and the little one says they have something to show you or want to play hide-and-go-seek, you get off the game and go do it. I don’t care if they want to show you the sunrays seeping in through the window and now sprawling out upon on the living room floor or if they just discovered that the tile in the kitchen is marbled with different colors- YOU GET UP! Because anytime your child has something to show you or tell you, it is a million times more important than what you are doing at that second.

The list continues, but, you get the picture. But oh yeah, do not forget that being a father also means being involved with important things. Especially like all schooling (filling out papers, parent-teacher meets, science fair night… etc), doctors visits, dance recitals, swimming meets, baseball games or any other hobby or sport the child is in that day, week, month or year.

And there should be two reasons for you to do all this and go above and beyond for your child: you love him/her with the fiber of your being and YOU ARE THE FATHER! ­­­­­­­­­­­

­*Note from the Authors: We know that there are a lot of good men out there that step up to plate and do their fatherly duties accordingly. There are those men who step up to the plate to take care of kids that aren’t even their biological children. This article is not for those fathers. This article is for the many fathers who aren’t stepping up to the plate. Also, this article can easily be called “Because You are the Mother.” This is not an attack by two mothers upon just fathers for the heck of it. There are many mothers out there who need a swift kick in the rear as well because they are lacking in the mother department. We just want to clarify that we understand, there are both fathers AND mothers who need to take more responsibility.