Because You are the Father

March 26, 2010

By: Ashley B. Vincent & Kristen DeJesus

You have a habit of not wanting to do something with your child. Perhaps you feel scared to give him/her a bath because he/she is little. Maybe you are not changing his/her diaper because you still don’t know the way the diaper faces or which way to wipe. I understand, newborns especially are kind of scary- I was scared to take care of my newborn all by myself for the first couple days, but eventually you get into the swing of things.

And with LOTS of patience and a little practice, everything starts to fall into place. Things become easier and not so scary. Stuff becomes more of a routine and sooner or later you stop thinking about what you are doing (i.e. feeding, changing, bathing… etc) with your child, and just start doing it… maybe…

Unless you are a delusional father who thinks they are doing everything for their child by just paying the bills and that is it. But NEWS FLASH… listen up daddies:

Being a father means being there for your child come hell and high water. Being a father means listening to your child and showing them that you care, letting them see that you are interested in even the most 'mundane' things in their life, their fears, their hopes, and anything and everything in-between.

Being a father means taking the time out of your 'oh-so-busy' day, to sit with your child for 5 minutes while they tell you a story, even if you just think it is a bunch of babble. Being a father includes, but does not stop at, unconditional love, emotional support, financial support, kissing boo-boos, giving hugs, playing 'tea party', reading, and coloring with your child.

Being father means giving up things for your child- when you are in an intense game of Call of Duty or Day of Defeat, and the little one says they have something to show you or want to play hide-and-go-seek, you get off the game and go do it. I don’t care if they want to show you the sunrays seeping in through the window and now sprawling out upon on the living room floor or if they just discovered that the tile in the kitchen is marbled with different colors- YOU GET UP! Because anytime your child has something to show you or tell you, it is a million times more important than what you are doing at that second.

The list continues, but, you get the picture. But oh yeah, do not forget that being a father also means being involved with important things. Especially like all schooling (filling out papers, parent-teacher meets, science fair night… etc), doctors visits, dance recitals, swimming meets, baseball games or any other hobby or sport the child is in that day, week, month or year.

And there should be two reasons for you to do all this and go above and beyond for your child: you love him/her with the fiber of your being and YOU ARE THE FATHER! ­­­­­­­­­­­

­*Note from the Authors: We know that there are a lot of good men out there that step up to plate and do their fatherly duties accordingly. There are those men who step up to the plate to take care of kids that aren’t even their biological children. This article is not for those fathers. This article is for the many fathers who aren’t stepping up to the plate. Also, this article can easily be called “Because You are the Mother.” This is not an attack by two mothers upon just fathers for the heck of it. There are many mothers out there who need a swift kick in the rear as well because they are lacking in the mother department. We just want to clarify that we understand, there are both fathers AND mothers who need to take more responsibility.

My Midnight Wal-Mart Release Party Adventure

March 20, 2010

I had planned to go there; and planning it wasn’t a question- I WAS GOING! I was going to go, and I was going to get my DVD if I had to wait in line all night long.

I am not that kind of person to stay up all night, so this was going to be a challenge, but I went. I wasn’t first in line. The people who were there first were there at 8:00pm. I myself was getting there around 10:30, 11:00pm, with my mom and daughter in tow for the evening to keep company. So, I made my way to the end of the line.

I wasn’t the end of the line; people were filing behind me right up until midnight and even thereafter. I most certainly wasn’t first in line as we established. However, I don’t think I was quite in the middle either. Because by the time 12:00am rolled in for the DVD to be released, the line wrapped halfway around Wal-Mart. But if I had to guess I would say my approximate location in the line was about 49 or 59 give or take a handful of people. I figure I am some sort of number 9 because the Wal-Mart workers were handing out quizzes to groups of ten and I figure there were about 4 or 5 groups ahead of my group.

Simple really. You fill out the quiz, compete against 10 other people in line, and three of the 10 get a prize- their choice of a Team Edward or Team Jacob water bottle. I… I wanted a water bottle, really bad. I turned over my quiz when they said go and I was lost.

Perhaps that was because they were asking things like, “What color roses aren’t in the Cullen’s kitchen?” I didn’t know the answer to that and to be frank, I don’t even know if that was the exact question anymore. I wasn’t paying attention to the color of roses anyway during the movie. I was more focused on dialog (which on those question that came from dialog, I did get correct.) But that is just me. You have those fanatics that study the movie and whatnot- I don’t do that.

So I filled out my quiz to the best of my ability. The people behind me were saying their answers aloud and on the ones I couldn’t figure out, I took theirs. I thought the little girl behind me knew what she was talking about. She was decked out in her Edward Cullen t-shirt and clutching her Twilight purse.

“STOP!” There it was- it was time to hand ours in. I felt like I was in school and I was afraid to fail the class, only this time I was afraid of… not getting a water bottle. They didn’t take long to grade, because before the anticipation could even start, they were back with the winners names. Ashley Vincent was not called. That could easily be because I did completely forget to put my name on the quiz anyway. But no matter the excuse I say I didn’t win, I didn’t win. Three other girls did. I was not happy. I tried so hard to get a water bottle, I offered to buy one, and couldn’t since they were only for promotional purposes.

I kept trying to reassure myself that it was good I didn’t win because that meant I wasn’t that crazy a fanatic. Although I am… a crazy fanatic over this. I'm a fanatic ... never thought I would be. EVER! When the books first started getting really popular, I cringed. I kept saying through all the hype, "Who cares about vampires and werewolves and some stupid girl loving them?" But in September 2009, I was introduced to Twilight. In less than 5 minutes, I was in. Hook, line and sinker- I was a fanatic. Here I was, 24 years old, with a daughter, falling for Edward, seeing eye-to-eye with Jacob, and loathing Bella, simply because it was not me!

I never have been crazy like this over a movie or a character. I have my loves for actors; I was in love with Ashton Kutcher for a long time! (Shhh, I still like him.) This, isn’t a love for a vampire or a werewolf. This isn’t a love for a guy who sparkles in the sun or has a feverish touch. This is a love for Robert Pattinson. Must be, because when he asked Bella to marry him at the end of New Moon, my voice was all that was heard in the theaters when I yelled, “YES ROBERT!” I am merely just head over heels for Robert. And I don’t care because, I am not too much older than him. He is just one year, one month and 3 weeks younger than me. That is so not grounds to call me a cougar.

Anyway, by the end of the night, I was whining I didn’t have a water bottle and so was my 3-year-old daughter who hadn’t even seen the movie. But I did get the DVD. I made my way to the front when the line started moving at 12:01am. There it was in my sight. I could see the stand. New Moon splashed all over it with Edward, Bella and Jacob’s faces. As I looked for my DVD, I noticed different prices. The ones in front of me were $24.99. Looked at it, and noticed that it did not have the 7-minute Eclipse preview. So I searched and looked and found the one with the preview… for $29.99. Searched some more and found just a standard, Twilight Saga New Moon two-disc special edition for $17.99. Sadly, not a “fan collectable,” but I was not paying $24.99 for just a “fan collectable” DVD with a fancy cover that changed when you moved it, and I wasn’t paying $29.99 just for a “fan collectable” that just had a 7-minute preview of a movie that will be out in just over three months.

So, maybe you want to dub me as not a big fan since I didn’t splurge for the preview. But I must say, anyone who stands in line for any amount of time to buy a DVD must be a fan of some sort. And my waiting for an hour and a half was worth my getting the DVD, because now, I get to go home, watch New Moon and at least wish that I could have a vampire life. (Not really, just wish I could meet Robert and have him sweep me of my feet. No biting or converting required.)